How My Husband’s Nickname For My Fake Boobs Helps Me Heal

News flash!  I have fake boobs! 

Okay, this really is not all that newsworthy, but it is something that often pops up in my daily conversations – usually with my husband and daughter, and a few really close friends.  Each one of those people knows what I had to overcome that year I was diagnosed with breast cancer.

I often make fun of my cancer.  Well, more so my “girls” that came from it.  It is the best way I know to keep everything on a positive note.  The jokes started right away.  I started coming up with names to introduce the new twins in my life.  The names ran from B1 and B2 to Lucy and Ethel.  However, the name I use the most with other cancer survivors is “Foobies.”


When I was starting my cancer journey, I would often browse through other blogs I could find to gain a more personalized feel for what to expect.  I called this my “Research.”  One day, my research led me to a blog.  This blogger fondly referred to her breast implants after reconstruction surgery as FOOBIES.  She stated these were 100% fake boobies: FOOBIES.  Other women, many of my friends included, have what she considered to be enhanced breasts.  Yes, those breasts are just as pretty as her Foobies, but there is a distinct difference between the two.

You see, Foobies is a name reserved for those that have nothing real at all.  Enhanced breasts have all the original parts while Foobies have nothing original except for skin.  Those women with fake boobs needed to stretch the skin.  They needed to put foreign mounds into their body to make something resemble what they had at one point in life.  Many of those women are living without nipples – I included.  And if those women wanted nipples, then those too would have to be built.  There is nothing natural about Foobies.

In the end, my favorite name for the twins is “The Elmer Fudds.”  My husband thinks that a pair of nipple-less Foobies looks like twin Elmer Fudds nursing.  If you have a good imagination and a memory of classic cartoons, you get the idea.

The point is that you need to see the silver lining in everything.  If that means making jokes about fake boobs, then that is one more thing that can help the healing process.

Learn more about Angela’s battle against breast cancer.

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