Choosing The Single Life Should Not Be Questionable, and Here’s Why
At a certain age, people expect things from you, including your life choices. Some would be interested in your career, while others will question your relationships, especially when you’re single. Friends, relatives, and colleagues will ask you endless questions. Starting with “What’s the problem?” or “Why can’t you find someone even when you’re a catch?” It even gets more problematic when your age is appropriate for marriage or when you’re nearing the big thirty. Being questioned for something you can’t control only adds pressure in life. Also, what if remaining single is a choice they decided for themselves?
Perhaps people raise an eyebrow because the older generation was used to getting married early in adulthood. But right now, the generation is more aware of the struggles of commitment. They’d rather be with themselves than settle in a relationship that clearly isn’t for the long run. Their eyes are more open to reality, which comes in different versions. Redditors shared their realities under XqueezeMePlease’s post, “What to respond when someone asks, ‘Why are you still single?'” The answers commenters wrote can make others realize that living a single life is not up for question. They have a valid reason for that, and here are a few responses from the comment thread.
Standards
It’s only right to have standards when finding a future partner. Listing your non-negotiables can save you from settling with the wrong person. Staying single can give you a better overview of what you want and need. “Go full-on Cher from Clueless: you see how picky I am about my shoes, and they only go on my feet!” AlanaByrd commented. If your standards aren’t met yet, then remaining single is the best decision. Lots of marriages end up in divorce because they compromise their non-negotiables. Choosing yourself and your standards is a form of self-love your future self will be grateful for.
Because Why not?
If being in a relationship is a choice, then opting for a single life is just the same. It’s the lifestyle that works for certain people. Others tend to think that it makes a person lonely, but they fail to realize that being with yourself is liberating. If it makes them happy and thriving, then why would others feel weird about their choice? Life is more than romance and building a family — a person has the right to choose what they need to attain in life. Longjumping-Bird-611 replied to xepci0, “Do what you want whenever you want and indulge yourself and no sacrifices.”
Experience From Previous Partners
Your past relationships play a huge role in making decisions about your dating life. Those who have been badly hurt by their previous partners tend to build high walls, especially when trust is involved. “Because the person I was with for 14 years had an affair and I can’t even trust a broken watch to be right twice a day,” cat-turd-cleaner shared. You’ll lose the will to try again due to the fear that even long-term relationships can end in just a snap. People who went through such pain preserve themselves by ignoring potential partners. Whether they display the greenest of all green flags, the person will continue to protect themselves by staying single. This just shows that single life is a choice and not a problem.
Personal Peace
“Because I like my personal space and peace at home. I can do what I want when I want,” Fenrisulfr1984 wrote. Finding inner peace is a years-long journey and takes a lot of effort to achieve. For this reason, it’s justifiable to keep that peace and avoid anyone who might distort it. Peace is a difficult state to achieve, and it’s rare to find a partner that will contribute to the sanctuary you’ve built for yourself. In the end, you have to choose yourself — never compromise that peace unless the person is worthy enough. Happiness in solitude is real and not just a defense mechanism to evade questions regarding singleness.
Most importantly, your status is not anybody’s business. People have to stop treating relationships as if it’s like choosing what clothes to wear. Clearly, it’s not, because finding a future partner takes effort, as you need to consider many things, such as compatibility, career, views, beliefs, and more. If someone stays single, just let them be. In most cases, they are happier and have more freedom than ever. Let them enjoy discovering and building themselves until they are ready to accept a companion.
The comment section is certainly an engaging discussion as you become aware of other people’s reality. If you are one of those content living the single life, you better join the comment thread. Let everyone know that they don’t have to feel bad about being their own person.
