A Year After She Was Diagnosed With Breast Cancer, Her Husband Felt A Lump In His Chest

Rays of Resilience: 31 Stories in 31 Days. So many people around the world have been affected by breast cancer, yet no two breast cancer journeys are the same. This Breast Cancer Awareness Month, we’re celebrating a new survivor every day. Their resilience is an inspiration to us all.

My name is Dalene. My husband’s name is Thomas.

In December of 2016, I went in for my regular mammogram. On December 22nd, I got called back for a repeat, which happened on December 26th. Within two days, I received a call; there was a suspicious spot on my mammogram.

On January 6th, I was scheduled for a needle biopsy. However, because of the location, it turned out a needle biopsy wasn’t possible. The mass was on the back wall of my left breast, almost on the rib cage, in the center.

A different biopsy was scheduled, and it came back cancerous. The surgeon told me that, because of its location, I wouldn’t have felt the lump myself until it was too late.

I had a lumpectomy. Two months later, I was scheduled for chemo. I wish someone would have told me chemo made your scalp hurt when your hair starts to fall out. I had my husband cut my hair off. I cried for a minute over losing my hair, but after a short time I came to love my bald head. I covered it by using some cute hats and some cute scarves. I didn’t get a wig. My baldness was a badge of honor.

I guess I was fortunate; I got the “red devil” chemo treatment but didn’t have the vomiting and nausea that usually comes from it — at least not until the very last treatment. That’s not to say I wasn’t sick. I got pneumonia and was so tired. All I wanted to do was sleep, but I fought through it and managed to do most of the housekeeping and even some gardening.

I have a weak immune system, and I have MS, diabetes type 2, and Primary Immunodeficiency Disorder. The chemo almost overwhelmed me, but I am a fighter.

When I started radiation, I had to take breathing classes because radiation can damage the heart. I remember my back hurt so bad, and the pain was terrible. In the middle of my treatment, my mom passed away, adding to my emotional distress. That was nearly a year ago.

I had my first clear mammogram in February of 2018. That same week my husband had a pain in his underarm, and when he showered, he found a lump near his right breast. When he told me about it, and I felt it, I told him he was going to the doctor the next day!

The doctor thought it was an abscess, but sent him for an ultrasound to be certain. The radiologist agreed it was an abscess. When he returned to the doctor three days later, the mass had doubled in size, despite him being on a strong antibiotic and steroids. It was too large to be drained in the office, so he was referred to a local surgeon. He was scheduled for surgery the next day.

That doctor told me it wasn’t an abscess; he said he had never seen anything like it. It had again doubled in size overnight. He said that when he took the specimens to the lab, the mass was black on the inside, but he was pretty sure it would come back as some type of viral infection.

A week later when we went back in to see him, he told us it was breast cancer. We were all in shock; breast cancer in men is so rare. Only 1% of breast cancers occur in men. My husband had a double mastectomy, but no chemo or radiation. It was deemed unsafe for him to have it, as he has NASH disease (non-alcoholic cirrhosis of the liver). He has since developed lymphedema and “cording” in his arms and shoulders.

Finding information about breast cancer in men is not easy. Most information involves women. Support groups are even harder to find.

We both had genetic testing, and we don’t have either the BRCA 1 or 2 gene mutation. We both have a MUTYH gene mutation, but that is more indicative of uterine or colon cancers. Uterine cancer runs in my family, and bladder cancer runs in my husband’s family.

We have been hit hard by cancer, but through the years we have overcome many difficulties. It has made us stronger. To be honest, I think it made our adult children realize that Mom and Dad are getting up there in our years; we are both in our mid 60’s.

We won’t be here forever, but while we are here, we will keep on fighting for our health and supporting the fight against cancer.

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